Funeral Etiquette

You might wonder about appropriate attire, whether to bring children along, how to approach the family of the deceased, or the best timing for a visit. At Westside Cremation and Burial Service, we offer helpful guidance on memorial and funeral etiquette, ensuring you feel equipped and at ease during this difficult time. Our aim is to help you navigate these moments with confidence and compassion, allowing you to support your friends and family effectively as they honor their loved one’s memory.

WHAT TO WEAR

When attending a memorial service or funeral, it’s best to choose attire in dark, muted colors such as navy, gray, brown, or black. Aim for a simple and conservative style that aligns with the solemnity of the occasion. Men typically wear a jacket and tie with dress shoes, while women can opt for either a dress or a suit. Additionally, jewelry should be discreet and traditional, reflecting the respectful nature of the event.

ARRIVING

When you attend a funeral or memorial service, strive to arrive punctually to honor the solemnity of the event. Make sure to enter the venue quietly to avoid disturbing those who are already seated. If ushers are not available, keep in mind that the front rows are generally reserved for family and close friends, so acquaintances should seat themselves further back or in the middle section.

WHEN TO VISIT

When you hear of a passing, it’s customary for family members and close friends to visit the bereaved’s home to extend their sympathy and support. This can be an incredibly overwhelming time for those grieving, and offering help with tasks such as childcare, meal preparation, welcoming visitors, or organizing service details can bring significant relief during this challenging period. The funeral home is an ideal location to express your condolences, as they are equipped to accommodate visitors during these services.

FLOWERS

Sending flowers is a heartfelt way to convey your sympathy to the bereaved family and can provide comfort during a challenging time. Flowers serve as a meaningful gesture that can be appreciated both during the funeral service and afterward. You can have floral arrangements or plants delivered directly to the funeral home to enhance the service or sent to the family’s home for a personal touch during their mourning period.

WHAT NOT TO SAY

Avoid making comments that may minimize the loss, such as “It’s probably for the best, as he was suffering,” or “I’ve been through something similar.” Such remarks are unlikely to offer comfort to those grieving. Instead, allow the family to address the cause of death in their own time; it’s best not to bring it up yourself.

KEEP THE LINE MOVING

Visitations can be profoundly emotional experiences, especially when connecting with the family of the deceased. If you find yourself in a line to offer your condolences and view the casket, it’s important to keep the line moving to respect everyone’s time. After you’ve had a moment to express your sympathies, step aside to chat further, allowing family members to continue welcoming other guests. Often, the family will be more available to talk once the service has ended, providing an opportunity for deeper conversations.

MOBILE PHONE USE

All smartphones should be turned off or silenced during the service to maintain a respectful atmosphere. Checking your phone can be distracting and may disturb those who are focused on honoring their loved one. If you need to respond to a message or take a call, please step outside quietly to avoid disrupting the service.

CHILDREN

Having a child attend a memorial or funeral can be a meaningful way for them to say goodbye to a loved one or friend. It’s crucial not to pressure them into going, but rather to gently encourage their participation in this family tribute. Prior to the event, take some time to prepare them by discussing what they might encounter during the service, helping to ease any anxieties they may have.

GIFTS

This period can be incredibly draining for a family, and offering food is a kind gesture that can provide much-needed relief during the stress of funeral planning and mourning. It’s also thoughtful to remember the children in the family, as they often struggle during such times; a small gift like a stuffed animal or a book can bring them comfort. Additionally, practical support is invaluable—assisting with household tasks can significantly lighten their load. Helping out by caring for pets, driving children to school, running errands, or lending a hand around the house are all meaningful ways to show your care and support during this challenging time.